“A cord of three strands—woven with love, respect, and faith—cannot be broken.”
It is good to be reminded of the incredible gift God has given us in the covenant of marriage. In Ephesians 5:25, Paul writes about how husbands are called to love their wives, and wives are called to respect their husbands. Ephesians 5:33 These aren’t just nice suggestions – Love and Respect are God’s blueprint for a thriving marriage.
Are you soon to be married? Perhaps you have concerns about continuing to feel your husband’s love for you once you are married for awhile. And your husband may have concerns about continuing to feel your respect for him.
(This post has been written for a special niece and her soon to be husband.)
Love and respect are like the oxygen that keeps a relationship alive and flourishing.
Love and Respect
These are some ways that a husband shows Love towards his wife:
- Listens with full attention, making eye contact.
- Shows thoughtfulness in the little things, like serving her unexpectedly sometimes.
- Shares household responsibilities without being asked.
- Extends daily affection, like a warm hug, a tender kiss, holding her hand.
- Speaks words of encouragement, expressions of appreciation, and reminders of how she is capable and beautiful.
- Shows interest in her world – Asks about her work, friendships, passions, and listens with care.
- Chooses kindness over harsh words.
- Makes her feel safe; emotionally– through showing kindness and patience and physically– by offering comfort and security.
- Prays with her and for her as he takes responsibility as spiritual leader of the home.
- Apologizes first when conflict arises.
These daily acts mirror Christ’s sacrificial love, which lays down self-interest for the sake of the other.
Small, consistent acts of love often speak louder than occasional big gestures.
Love and Respect
Now, respect is just as vital as love, especially for a husband.
A husband feels respected when his wife:
- Expresses appreciation often- thanks him for the things he does, big or small so he knows his efforts matter.
- Encourages his dreams. Cheers him on in his work, hobbies, and goals, letting him know she believes in him.
- Listens without interrupting – Gives him space to share his thoughts and feelings even if she doesn’t agree on everything.
- Speaks kindly about him – Builds him up in front of others instead of pointing out his flaws.
- Trusts his judgement – Shows confidence in his ability to make good decisions, and supports him when he leads.
- Shows affection and admiration – Compliments him genuinely, and lets him know that she is proud to be his wife.
- Is his safe place – Offers understanding, grace, and forgiveness when life feels heavy.
- Respects his need for space – Truly, both partners need quiet time, rest, or a hobby that helps them recharge.
- Partners with him on challenges- Tackles family, financial, or household decisions as a team.
- Celebrates who he is – Recognizes his strengths, quirks, and unique qualities that make him who he is.
A husband feels respected when his wife believes in him, and communicates that she values his role as her partner. Respect breathes confidence into him, just as love gives comfort to her.
The Garden Image
When love and respect come together, marriage becomes a partnership that reflects God’s design—one where both husband and wife are built up and strengthened.
And just like a garden, marriage needs tending. — If we leave a garden alone, weeds will creep in, and the soil will dry out. But
when we water it, nourish it, and pull away the weeds, it becomes fruitful and beautiful.
In the same way, a marriage that is attended to with care—through prayer, forgiveness, time together, and daily choices of love and respect—will blossom into something lasting and life-giving. Such a marriage not only blesses the couple, but it blesses everyone around them, just as a flourishing tree offers shade and fruit to those nearby.
The Third Strand
Even more than that, Scripture reminds us in Ecclesiastes 4 that a cord of three strands is not quickly broken. When God is the third strand in a marriage, His presence brings strength beyond
what two people alone can provide. — He steadies the couple in hard seasons, multiplies their joy in times of blessing, and makes their union a living testimony of His love.
Encouragement
So my encouragement to you is this: never stop practicing love and respect in your marriage.
Let love be seen not just in big gestures, but in daily kindness. — Let respect be spoken not just in grand declarations, but in the way you honor and trust one another in ordinary moments. And above all, keep God at the center—for with Him, your marriage will not only endure, but flourish.
Closing Prayer
Heavenly Father, we thank You for the gift of marriage and for all the couples who enter into this covenant before you. We ask Your blessing over their union—that their love would be deep, their respect unshakable, and that You would be the strong third strand that holds them together. May their marriage reflect Your grace, bring joy to their home, and shine as a witness of Christ’s love in this world. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
A Beautiful Wedding Prayer!
Other Resources
Article: Would You Want To Be Married To You?
Podcast Video: Experiencing The Best Marriage For You and Your Spouse.
