My precious mom is now “absent from her body and is now present with the Lord Jesus.”

 She had Alzheimer disease for a number of years before she passed. Thankfully, she was able to live at home with dad  for some of those years as he was very loving and attentive to her needs. Eventually, it became too difficult and she needed more care and attention than he was able to provide as he was advanced in years so she went to live in the nursing home in the dementia wing.

Alzheimer disease is often called “the long goodbye” and for good reason….it is a painful process of a loved one gradually losing their memory of even their beloved family. 

Dad was so faithful to visit Mom, driving every day in all kinds of weather to be with her- even in his elderly years! She remembered him for a long time and even though in the last years, did not understand their relationship, she still had a close connection with him and loved having him visit.

I would sometimes pick Mom up at the Nursing home and take her back to her family home to visit with Dad and for a while this was working out ok. However, it became too stressful for Mom as she felt confused – not knowing where her home was…it was heartbreaking!

The last time I took her home, she and Dad held each other tightly in the kitchen- both crying as they said goodbye-  when it was time for me to take her back to the nursing home.

I knew then that these visits at home were too hard for them – especially for mom -as she felt so lost.

By this time, driving in the car was scary for her.

On Wednesday 21st, 2013,  morning, mom had a mild stroke or heart attack which left her unconscious and completely unresponsive. Mom had this happen to her several times over the past 11 years while in the  Manor but rallied every time with amazing strength in her little body. The Doctor was at the Manor that morning ( he is only there once a week) and came down to see Mom. They called me around noon Wednesday to say that they felt mom didn’t have much time. I made a couple of calls and headed out to pick Dad up and we went to the Manor to be with her. When I arrived she was stable. Dad went home and I stayed overnight with her, sleeping on a small  pullout in her room. 

Over the next 24 hours I sat with her and she remained unconscious, lying perfectly still showing no sign of life.

Her condition remained about the same with a few rougher patches that occurred when the nurses would change her position. 

On Thursday, the 22^nd  just before 1pm,  the nurses once again came into her room to change  her position  to lying flat on her back. My mom’s sister was sitting with me and we left the room while they cared for mom.

Just a few moments later we went back into the room and as I was entering the room, I saw mom was lifting her arm up off the bed!  She was still lying completely still with eyes closed and no sign of life except for that raised arm!

My first thought was – oh wow, she is coming around! Then as I looked at mom’s face, I could see the color fading from her face. I quickly understood that she was slipping away and I said to Mom’s sister,  “Mom is leaving us right now”.

 Since this was mom’s first movement of her body since she became unconscious on the 21st, we were really amazed but we didn’t think too much more about it right then.

However, as I was on my long drive home that night I was thinking through the day’s events, particularly of mom’s last moments. I was suddenly covered with goose bumps from head to toe as I understood what had happened when Mom’s hand was raised.

I know that when mom raised her arm, it was an angel coming for her. She was responding to her angel’s extended hand who was there to take her home! I felt overwhelmed that I had witnessed this event!

 I was so excited that I pulled off the road and called one of my sisters to share this. It has been 10 years since Mom passed and this  memory is still vivid in my mind. It will stay with me forever!

She was indeed a wonderful woman, one we can look to as an example. We, her family,  dearly miss her but rejoice that she is no longer a victim of Alzheimer’s disease and a body that no longer served her. Now I think of her in heaven with her Savior Jesus, in her new body, celebrating with those who went on before her.  

At her funeral, I spoke about mom and used the following Bible passage to describe her dedication to God, her husband and  her family.

                                                                                   ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

In Proverbs 31 we read about the ideal, perfect-sounding, super-woman that women tend to compare themselves to – particularly on Mother’s day.  I took a sampling of the verses and I’d like to share how my mother modeled the lady spoken of there.

Of course Mom was not perfect but she was a lovely, godly woman!

Proverbs 31:10  says:  

“Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?  She is more precious than rubies.  Her husband can trust her and she will greatly enrich his life.  She brings him good, not harm,  all the days of her life. ” 

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  Mom gave Dad 9 children to enrich his life and she did an amazing job of keeping our home clean and organized with lots of homemade food to enjoy. Mom supported dad in his spontaneous hospitality often setting extra places for unexpected guests, either people we knew- and oftentimes hitchhikers. Dad made sure they went away with some spiritual food to chew on too! 
• Even when mom’s mind was confused by her disease, she still had a hospitable heart. She would see a friend in the mirror (her own image) and have conversations with her friend. She would  ask dad if she could invite her friend to eat with them and  Dad would graciously set the extra place at the table 💕😊
• Mom supported Dad by having his mother, Gramma MacDougall live with us. After her passing, dad supported mom as her mom,  Grammie Garrett also came to live with us.
•  Mom showed her love to Dad in quiet ways. One memory I have is that often in the evening, my dad would lay on the couch, with his head on mom’s lap and she would rub his head and remove sawdust from his ears. (He was a Lumberman) Dad was also sensitive to Mom’s needs and he hired a lady to help with the house work when the children were young as it was a very busy household with 9 children! As we grew up each of us were given our chores to do each evening and on Saturdays- so it was a family effort. I believe that one of the great gifts mom and dad gave to us was – teaching us how to work.

Proverbs 31:15  says:

“She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household  and plan the day’s work for her- servant girls”…

•  Mom often had a bit of a break in the morning as Dad always made the porridge for breakfast.
• Mom didn’t have any servant girls her but she did have 3 daughters and she planned our work. Saturday was work day and that meant scrubbing, waxing, dusting and baking.  Mom often made a big batch of bread and some sweet treats…it smelled and tasted so good!
• Mom worked hard every day to provide us with hot, home-made, nutritious food  and  keep our clothes clean.

Proverbs 31:16 says

“She goes to inspect a field and buys it; with her earnings she plants a vineyard. She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. She extends her hand to the poor …and opens her arms to the needy.” 

• Though Mom never worked (for wages) outside her home after she married,  she kept the financial records for the lumberyard and was church treasurer for her small country church for many years. As well, Mom taught Sunday School for many years and she and dad would pick up more kids to bring along whose parents did not attend. That was in the days of station wagons and no seat belts required. We had quite a car full!

As for giving, she and dad were very generous with the resources God entrusted to them and dad once told me that whenever they discussed a gift they planned to give,  mom would always have a larger sum in mind than he did- which really surprised me because my dad was a very generous man who lived a very simple and satisfied life. 

They wisely lived by the words of Jesus in Matthew 16:20:

“Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal.” 

 Proverbs 31:24 

“She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.”   

• Mom never had fine linen and purple gowns, but she took great care in her personal attire and when she dressed up in the finest she had – she always looked beautiful and elegant to me.

Proverbs 31:28 

“Her children stand and bless her.”

•  There were many struggles my mom and dad faced while raising their children and there was plenty troubles that brought them great heartache. Mom spent many hours praying for us and watching at night for us to come home.  I do know that every one of her children would want to honor her and give her the credit she so rightly deserves for the unselfish devotion of her life to serving God, her husband and children.
  

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